It’s not all hype—you really can have an amazing anal orgasm. The key is to learn more about it and anal sex in general so that you can educate yourself and your partner about how to find bliss through back-door sex. Here’s what you need to know.
1. WHAT IS AN ANAL ORGASM, EXACTLY? Because there are nerves running from the anterior wall of the rectum to the vagina, rectal stimulation is not only possible, some people even prefer it. An anal orgasm happens when those nerves contract, just like the nerves in your clitoris or vagina, giving you an overwhelming surge of pleasure.
2. FINDING THOSE NERVES ISN’T DIFFICULT. When you push up towards your belly button with a sex toy or your finger, you should try to do the same movement you would when finding your G-spot. This enables you to stimulate that nerve that covers so many sensual hot spots in the vaginal and anal areas.
3. INCLUDE YOUR CLITORIS FOR EVEN MORE FUN.If you love clitoral orgasms, you’ll love that you can stimulate your clitoris through anal play—now there’s a good reason to try it! The reason is because your clitoris is shaped like a wishbone, so for many women, it moves all the way down to the anus. By gently stimulating your anus, you also reach the clitoral “legs.”
4. IT’S IMPORTANT TO START SLOW.You might be raring to go, but don’t rush anal sex. Just don’t. You need to go slowly so that you can try different things to find what stimulates you the best. Start with a finger or sex toy to play around in the area. Much like with G-spot or clitoral orgasms, being aroused doesn’t come standard for every woman. You owe it to yourself to find what feels good.
5. HAVE A DIFFERENT ORGASM FIRST.It can really help to have a different kind of orgasm before trying to have an anal orgasm, so have penetrative sex or let your partner stimulate your clitoris. That way, when your body’s relaxed and you’ve aroused your nerves, it’ll make it easier for you to experience an anal orgasm. You might even experience a blended orgasm, which is a clitoral and vaginal orgasm simultaneously.
6. USE LUBE. You’ve heard it before and you’re going to hear it again: you need to have lots of lube handy before trying anal sex. Remember, your anus can’t stretch or widen like the vagina, so when your partner penetrates you, it could hurt. The thing is, it’s not supposed to. Avoid pain by letting the lube flow. Lube also makes things feel nice and wet, which is arousing in and of itself. It also makes sex with a condom much more pleasurable. What’s not to love?
7. YES, YOU NEED TO USE A CONDOM.Even if you’re in a LTR with your partner, a condom during anal sex is a must to prevent the transfer of bacteria—both for you and your partner. Use this to your advantage. Sometimes condoms can produce really nice sensations on your sensitive private areas, which could help you to climax.
8. FORGET THE BIG O. While you’re excited to experience an anal orgasm, just think of how focusing too much on having orgasms in general can send them packing. It’s the same when you have anal sex. Forget about the climax because that can actually block your chances of having one. Instead, just enjoy the experience.
9. LOCATE THE PS SPONGE. Your perineal sponge (or PS sponge) is found between the rectum and vagina, beneath the strip of skin you can feel between your anal and vaginal openings. This perineal sponge is basically erectile tissue, so it fills up with blood when you’re aroused in the same way as the clitoris does. Find it by inserting your thumb into your vagina and an index finger into your anus. Gently apply some pressure by moving your thumb backward in a circular motion while your index finger pushes upwards. You’ll feel the tissue right there!
10. CHOOSE POSITIONS THAT STIMULATE THE PS SPOT.To maximize sexual pleasure during anal sex, you should always find the most comfortable sexual position. If you want to rub up against the PS spot, try missionary or be on top during sex. That way you won’t only reach it but get to control how much you want it stimulated.
11. TALK ABOUT IT!By far the most important thing to do during anal sex to make it as pleasurable and orgasmic as possible is to communicate with your partner. As with other forms of sex, you should be vocal about what feels good versus what doesn’t. This helps you get the most pleasure out of the act while also helping you to relax so you can enjoy the experience much more than hoping your partner will somehow get the hint that what he’s doing isn’t really working. In addition, your brain’s the sexiest organ, and sometimes just talking about having hot anal sex can be what you need to tip you over the edge into Orgasm Town. Have fun!